Write.

I’ve been thinking of a creative title for the past 3 days. I knew I wanted to make myself sit down and blog about my first morning waking up in the Bay Area as a newcomer. I wanted some profound catchy title. I thought about writing first thing this morning–but since I woke up at 5am bright-eyed, disoriented, and starving, I was distracted by my buddy Maslow reminding me of the basic needs I needed met immediately…FOOD.

I then quickly learned that west coast football = morning football; my Pittsburgh Steelers were playing at 10:00am so no time to write #gametime. With an afternoon quickly filled with answering check-in phone calls, making sure folks knew I was alive, and hitching a ride  with a new colleague to do my first Californian Trader Joe’s run (please note: Bring your own bags!), I walked back in to my sleeping stomping grounds feeling a bit outpaced.

Day. 1. Maslow: Basic Needs met… the reality of the move starts to settle in…time slows…heart rate sky rockets…thoughts racing…

You came here dear Cierra on a one-way ticket. You left the comforts of your 2 bedroom 2 bathroom apartment, your dog, your family, your friends, and you now are shacking up in dorm-style room  with whatever happened to fit in three rolling suitcases. What in the actual hell did you pack that you truly needed?? Have you ever arrived some where and try to make sense of why you packed certain things over others?  I have enough clothes to avoid laundry for 3 months… but no toothbrush case or deodorant *rolls eyes*. I have enough shoes to change my outfit 5 times in a day, but no rain boots or shoes that can put up a fight to wetness…nope..tennis shoes…and “dress boots”…it’s been raining since I arrived. You have 8 bottles of perfume but no blanket {you want to go night night, *****? Kevin Hart reference…} WTF!

I’m fine. Truly I am, lol– I literally just laughed at myself as I re-read my post lol, but really guys I’m okay 🙂 I have my basic needs, but it’s funny what we think we need until we realize what we truly need. I need time. Me time. I need some down time of adjusting. Time to mentally work through all that has happened in the past 24 hours, and what will happen over the next few weeks…months…years?  I need time to cope with no dog–no Ruby laying her head on my lap as she sense my anxiety. I need time to sit in silence, hear the rain, and wrap my mind around being patient with transition. Silent time to remind myself that I am just fine and that I have hit my quota of “figuring out” for today; my brain needs a break.

I’m a Virgo, so naturally one of the first things I did after situating my basic needs was starting to organize. Make list. Write goals. Perfect my living environment (everything has it’s place!) In my “perfecting” I was swept with the overwhelming reality of no matter how exciting and life altering and guts-y this move is… there is no way I’m master overnight perfection. There’s no way I am settling in to the reality of this decision in less than 24 hours. You can, however write. “You need to write, Cierra.”

Write. That’s the title I came up with for my first big day in The City. So I’ll continue to write…and write…and process…and write. I’ll continue looking forward and stepping in to all the discomfort and allow myself to feel everything I’m feeling. I’ll look forward to continuing to find all the little nuggets of encouragement my mom secretly packed within my luggage…because she is the best and she knows that I was unpacking the moment I got here. ❤

What a blessing to have an opportunity to experience a fresh start. What a blessing to look at myself in the mirror and say “Here you are, Cierra. You have actualized your vision board….it’s time to create a new one and start living the life you were designed to live.”

hydration.nutrition.fit.sound.

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