I just finished the JJ Green Smoothie Cleanse ; 10 days of intentionally eating green smoothies to help reset my palate. I’ve been successful in the adventure before– about 2 years ago I did the full cleanse and nearly shocked myself around my ability to stay the course. This time around I committed to a modified version: deciding that if I tried to go 10 full days with just green smoothies, I’d likely succeed, and back track. I’d finish strong and then you’d find me eating an entire pizza in one setting….defeats the purpose right?
So I modified. I made these past 10 days about clean eating and getting back in touch with what happened. How did I gain all this weight again?
Day 9 (today) while emotionally abusing myself about the burning desire to eat Chipotle. In the middle of feeling all of those emotions I realized that green smoothie cleanses, juice cleanses, palate resetting tools are quite dangerous if used unsupervised.
Let me explain myself. The concept is great if your clear on your Why. If your why is centered on mentalities that come from a healthy, whole, place– then go for it! If your Why is because you are trying to figure out how you regained weight so you’re going back to past behaviors….like me??… pump the breaks.
Slow all the way down. Put your cleanse on a halt and look at yourself in the mirror and ask (out loud) why are you doing this?
- None of my clothes fit
- My gut is unbareable
- It’s my birthday in 8 weeks and I’m embarrassed about how out of control I feel
- 10 year high school reunion coming up- great- I’m going to be THAT girl.
the list goes on.
As honest as this list is and as honest and raw as these emotions are– the other reality to this space is THIS IS NOT THE TIME TO DO A CLEANSE.
If you hear a constant A-track in your head playing about what you haven’t done or how far you are from where you are trying to go– that’s worse time to get restrictive. You’ll get on the scale (like i did) and be pissed to see that much of nothing has changed. Why? Because your (my) body is holding entirely too much stress and anxiety to do anything else but hold you exactly where you are.
On day 9 of my cleanse I went to Chipotle. I got a salad, with a side of guac and chips. I went to one of my favorite places on campus to eat.I sat on this bench-quietly- and presently eating my meal. halfway through the chips and guac I was full- tossed the remaining chips and sat.
Guess what? The world did not end. I didn’t suddenly stop fitting in the clothes I was wearing. And still…. I felt this guilt swimming over me… “You ate chips!” I sat there and I felt what it feels like to be a person that’s spent so much time being consumed by what I’m eating. So consumed by consumption….and for what.
I share this for the people who start a cleanse and find themselves unable to finish. I share this for the person who’s beating them self up because they just can’t seem to get it right. I share this for the weight battlers who haven’t hit their goal weight. Who look on their bookshelves and TV stands full of workout videos and best help books wondering how much money they’ve invested into something they can’t stick with. You are not alone. You are not a failure. You are your on greatest success story.
I keep waiting for the day that my story is reflective of over coming all these obstacles. I keep praying for my before and after pictures to mimic those of my Beachbody friends. I keep trying to force myself into health.
If you think about the true mindset of health–however– health is centered on so much more than weight. Health is centered on you getting to a place where you love yourself exactly where you are- which takes time…
Healthy takes time, not a cleanse. Healthy takes patience. It comes with speed bumps, detours, roadblocks, and patches of smooth sailing.
I took a detour- and while on that detour I missed a few turns. Doesn’t mean I can’t find my way back to the road… I just have to be practical not irrational. I have to enjoy the sights of the off path experience. This off-road rugged terrain is preparing me to stand the test of time… Of patience.
If you’ve started something and can’t post your result photos or celebrations yet…you aren’t alone. We’re writing one hell of a story.