Welp friends. I’m getting a knee arthroscopic procedure done this coming Monday. I decided for this instance (and many instances) in my life to start actively choosing faith over fear. I’m currently reading Joel Osteen’s “It’s Your Time”. While people have their own feelings on what can sometimes feel like his fluff, my optimistic spirit that I’ve managed to murder over the years, resonates with his words.
Faith and Fear come from the same place– both are unknown–both involve believing in something that we have no control over–both come from the pit of your stomach–difference? Faith energizes you while fear drains you. (Osteen, 2009)
I’m tired of feeling drained. I’m tired of actively choosing to worry and stress. I’m tired of hiding my vulnerabilities and always trying to present as this PERFECTLY put together little puzzle. A colleague looked at me the other day and said,
“Cierra, let go of perfect, you’ll kill the beauty of yourself in trying to find perfection. Welcome your flaws, accept that you don’t have all the answers, and recognize that the mysteries of life are what make this place called earth fun.”
The truth is, PEOPLE LOVE ME JUST AS I AM
(and those that don’t can kick rocks!) ! They love my laugh, my smile, my energy, my corky awkward style, my mood swings, my insecurities, my conversation, my love for life, my low moments, my spirituality, my health goals, my mental breaks the list goes on– there are people that love all of those aspects of me, and I’ve spent all my time trying to perfect every flaw instead of seeing the beauty within them.
I’m coming to the realization that I wasn’t put on this earth to please everyone, [None of us were] I was placed here to serve God, to be beacon of light to others, and to allow my story- a story that many others share, be a source of vulnerability and growth. To allow my story to bring someone else into their own light.
“Our greatest flaw is shunning the gifts within our flaws.”- Me.
I don’t always say the right things at the right time. I don’t always know what to say or how to respond, or what it is I truly want. What I do know is that every day that I choose faith over fear– one small decision at a time, I’m one step closer to walking in the light–towards the light–forever in the light of Christ. I am one step closer to finding peace in the uncertainty of life.
Healthy Knees, Healthy Me–Please send prayers up for the hands of God to lead Dr. Jones to relief, recovery, and release from fear ❤