Day 22: Creating New Habits

I moved back to Columbus in August of 2013. Coming from Nashville, TN, where I spent the later part of the year re-introducing myself to a fitness-provoked lifestyle. I found love in competitive workouts while in Graduate school at Michigan State; I joined Lansing Fit Body Boot Camp and Emeka (the trainer there) helped me discover my inner athlete. I was cheerleader and passively played soccer throughout middle school/high school—-soccer because I just wanted to have at least ONE thing in common with my highly athletic, well-liked, and handsome big brother. I never could see myself as someone who was physically fit or remotely physically coordinated. Cheering came easy- I had the personality of cheerleader (or so people shared with me, not sure what that actually means??) I’m flexible so jumps and such came with ease. Tumbling was a different story, but a passion to be acrobatic as one of my very best friends led me to successfully competing on our competition squad- landing that damn back handspring at our Cedar Point( or Kennywood…I can’t remember) competition. I had quite a few wipe outs prior to that experience- shoutout to St, John Arena floor for breaking my knees a few time!)

When I left Michigan to go to Nashville, I went through mental break of sorts where I couldn’t figure out how to NOT be a student. I had been in school all of my life and now I was suddenly expected to be an adult? Go to work 8-5p? Pay rent? Make a budget? Buy furniture?!- No thanks! I’ll take a new wardrobe and sleep on the floor thanks! The world I had grown so familiar with was wiped away and once again, I felt exposed.

I found my way back to fitness around January after putting on about 25lbs of sulking in my emotional weight. My friend Julia, (hey girl!) was having a lot of success with Cross Fit (emotionally and physically), I knew I liked competitive work outs, so I decided to give it a shot. I worked with a trainer for a few weeks and then moved on to working out with one of my friends on the Vandy Football coaching staff (what up Charles! *pinkies*). Something clicked again! We were doing morning workouts and he was helping me address my emotional eating– 15 pounds gone. Holla.

Hello to life transition #3! I take a job back at my alma mater and go through all of the emotional eating of transitioning all over again. I joined a small gym in German Village that I absolutely loved (Hey Taj!) The budget got tight so I sacrificed my physical/emotional health for financial stability. #fail I was still spending the money and further feeding hurtful body image habits.

Around November I hoped on the scale to see my highest weight…ever. EVER. I swore I would never see that damn number and there it was- looking at me and sayin ” yeaaa shawty, you know what it isssss”- in my best T.I. voice

I joined the gym in November, I attempted small group for the month of January with my personal feel-good cheerleader, Kyle Kline,  and started with Team Boot Camp with my Motivator, Brian Walsh, at the end of February. That’s 6.5 months of me building my commitment to fitness. Building my stamina of making my health a priority. It’s May, and while the scale has not budged, I think I’m finally catching on.

For me, and for where I currently am in my life, I have to start making some decisions, recognizing their impact on my future. As I’ve mentioned before- my health journey has slowly but surely introduced me to concepts, nutrition, workouts, people, environments, etc that I know I need to be successful. Knowing that, I also see a pattern of leaving/moving/transitioning….evening bailing.

Heavy on my heart lately has been the idea of committing to 6 more months at Lifetime Fitness– to giving myself a full year of staying at one gym, at one job, at one apartment, in one car, and in one mindset: If I can commit to continue to build on (not knock down and start all over again) but to BUILD on all of my fitness and health experiences thus far, fight through the internal battle, and make this commitment- that this 6 months will change my life forever.

Sounds crazy right? That’s because it logically doesn’t make sense- given my past and my timeline- I bail on fitness. I bail on health goals because it’s easier to eat brownies than it is to eat an apple. It’s easier to go to happy hour than to explain to your friends that happy hour is a mental mind f**k for you, it’s easier to get take out, than to grill a 6lbs bag of chicken breast and meal prep every week. It’s all easier.

In church yesterday, Pastor mentioned that most often the things that make the LEAST amount of sense- concepts that seem impossible, unrealistic, or “too imaginative”  typically come from God. These feelings typically come from God while he’s asking you to trust him. To have enough faith to let go, and let him work, and to know that most things that come easy aren’t worth having.

Here’s to my 6 months, God. Here’s to my letting go of all the worries around finances; to committing to hold on and give this 6 month commitment to you.

Let’s get it.





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